Being a Woman - A Strength or a Weakness?

Photography by : Prakash Daniel 

Many times. Several times. Enough times for me to write about it have i been asked this question
Is it a weakness or a strength to be a woman on stage? A young girl sat across me with curious eyes and dreams so fresh that i could smell them off her long beautiful dyed hair and fair soft skin like butter milk. She grabbed her paper and pen - thanking me for coming down to oblige her for an interview for her university's class project.

Topic : As a female/woman comedian - how is Sharul Channa coping in the market since it is a male dominated industry.

Just this once i prayed under my breathe hoping she will interest me in talking about  other topics to do with comedy or she will ask me the same question in a way  that i won't even realize she is asking me this question i have been asked a thousand times.

She managed to succeed in asking me more than she intended to and i answered more than i had intended on answering. At some point, the conversation boiled down to - so is it a strength being a woman or a weakness?

I found myself just hesitating to properly answer the question. Somehow i couldn't find the words to put it in a sentence - maybe i needed a paragraph. I believe sometimes while talking to others, you manage to find a nugget of knowledge which you didn't otherwise think you have or could come up with. It's like you connect with the divine or some sort of energy to say something so profound that you shock yourself - did I really say this? I ? Who am i to know this? How did this simply drop into my psyche, my soul, my brain?

Many a times women start to believe that its strong to be a weak woman and its weak to be a strong woman. Meaning?

If you come across  as a strong woman- you know the sort…yapping about everything and talking about woman rights and what she really thinks  and making bold statements because she truly believes what she is saying. Society tends to think that she is too strong and women should not be like that because we're not supposed to have such strong opinions. God forbid if you have a husband who speaks less or have a good friend who keeps quiet - Suddenly, they start looking smarter compared to you and people go , " Oh, your friend is very sweet and classy!" and all they have to say about you is…"You potty mouth!"

These judgements are many a times made by women themselves - for other women. Some sort of jealously to see a liberated woman because they themselves could never speak so freely. It happens.

So what was my answer? Strength to be a woman or a weakness?

Many women have made their gender their own weakness. I have heard many say - "but how will i do it?" ," but i need some help? " , "but i am alone?, " but what will they say? " , "but i don't know?" ,
"should i say something? " , "things will sort themselves out." , " I need to discuss this with my husband."

Funnily enough, i have heard these same women say things about other women who dress well and run businesses and go for late night parties - " Ah, she is such a slut!" , "Just look at the way she is dressed!" , " She doesn't really take care of her kids!" .


I think the day women start thinking that they are good enough and self-sufficient to achieve what they need to - their relationships will improve and so will their self-worth. We make it difficult for ourselves by heavy negative self-talk and  we disgrace other women at the same time. We need to empower each other and face society with confidence,power and continue to work hard. Believe in yourself and everyone else will. You could be a man and take this same advice. You need no one's support but your own. Go out and do something. One thing everyday to prove to yourself that you are self-sufficient. Its perfectly alright to love yourself and let it be known. Yes, at the same time - don't be mean to others and please keep your kindness intact.

How do i find my confidence again? - some might ask.
Book a flight for one and travel alone to any destination. Get lost and find yourself. It is the most beautiful feeling in the world.

It's a strength to be a woman and weaknesses can be manipulated to become another strength.

Go find a paper and make a list of things to do and call it
If i wasn't afraid of anything - i would :
And then do those things.

I will write my list below and you could share yours with me too.

If i wasn't afraid of anything - i would :

1. Smile more often
2.  Call up some people and tell them that i truly love them
3. Go hiking
4. Take a trip somewhere to just write more jokes
5. Book a theatre and do my one hour show
6. Cut my hair - Pixie style
7. Start my own youtube channel
8.  Do a corporate show without feeling extremely nervous of saying the wrong things
9. Wear sleeveless cos i have always been shy of my arms
10. Tell my dad that he needs to watch one of my stand-up shows without me bursting into tears because it will be emotional for me

Yeah.

The interview went well btw and it was great talking to Dora - hope she finds her strength in being a woman and fulfills her dreams. :)

Btw, if you think i am too strong a woman for you to handle - you have a weakness you need to work on. ;)


Love and laughter,

Sharul Channa

#Countingblessings

Featured by Anokhi Media

Featured by Straits Times - several times this year! 

Entertained a large group of audiences so far this year! Here is a small picture ;)

Hosted many shows too!

                         Started Gypsy Comedy Singapore In Association with Moshi Moshi Bollywood

                     Performed for Superkam 2 twice this year and sold out shows with great feedback !

Performed in Delhi, Mumbai Twice this year!

Hosted/ Performed for 4 shows - Singapore Comedy Fringe 2014 !

Toured with 'Comedy on heels' - We performed in KL, Sabah and Mumbai !

More shows! 

Performed in Bangalore and Singapore as an ensemble cast of
Gangamitrdhaara! ( Samarpana festival 2014)

Another night by Gypsy Comedy Singapore !

Performed with Kumar as part of 'Kumar and the Gypsies' at Star Performing Centre

Again, an all woman show as part of the Singapore fringe festival !

Loved performing on the stage of Home Club as part of Comedy Masala.
Home club became canvas this year but i still miss the stage and the memories it brought.
I started doing comedy on this very stage - 3 and half years ago.

Had the privilege of getting my close friend Vernon Lewis to perform at Moshi Moshi.
He is no more but he lives in our hearts forever and ever.

Hosted this show featuring Ali Zafar

           

My Beautiful Indonesian Sister.

Dear All,

This post was long overdue and it won't be perfect because it cannot be perfect. It can't be said perfectly because words will never be enough. Never. What are words but sounds put together and have a value of less than 1 cent sometimes. Feelings and emotions pump these words up. When the feelings are real of course. The truth. The truth hits the gut harder than anything else in the world. The truth can be told in less than 50 words and sometimes silence is enough. The women of Indonesia - our beautiful helpers who come down to countries like Singapore to work. Our maids. Our sisters. Recently, i was talking to one of the Indonesian helpers under my condominium. How do we view these women? Just take a moment to check your conscience. You see a helper under the block on the phone taking a walk and immediately many people will think of that as - she must be talking to her boyfriend. Her bangladeshi boyfriend to be precise. Sometimes that's not true and even if it is - what is wrong with that. These women of Indonesia are more liberated and independent than any other women i have met in my life.
I hear clients talk about their maids and sometimes in the most degrading manner. I heard recently - " my maid is lazy and likes to take 2 hour naps in the afternoon." In our busy social media indulgent life, we forget that these people are respectable human beings like us too. They have wishes, hopes and a love life. Yes, their quality of life is different to ours but why can't we give them the mutual respect that they deserve. 2 hour naps are important for these ladies because they wake up early and do your dirty job for you. Yes, they get paid for it. How much? $400 to $800 a month. What happens to a bulk of this money have you ever asked yourself. I will tell you what happens to one such helper i spoke to.

For anonymity purpose, i will call her D.

D came down to Singapore 4 years back. She came here because her husband wasn't earning enough money back home and she had to do something to educate her children. She moved to Singapore and started to work hard. Each month she transferred $400 of her pay to her children so that they could go to school, pay for bike loan, pay for house rental etc. She was left with $50 and sometimes $100 per month for herself. After 2 years of working in Singapore, she got a call from her brother saying her husband had re-married. This news broke her into pieces but she didn't let herself fall apart. She gathered herself and rebuilt herself with hope and courage. Every month, she sends a bulk of her pay to her children and for the past 4 years..this is routine. She has no savings. Her life revolves around the house and watching indian serials in the afternoon because that's what "mam" likes to watch. So when people turn around and say that these women are lazy, let me tell you - they are more liberated than those gucci and prada carrying women who do nothing but attend social parties and art events. Life is so much more than these. If you want to learn what work- life balance is - ask these ladies. These strong women who stay in Singapore. Each of them with their own story. Each one with their own goals and each one with their own money- transfer account. They are away from family and working hard to feed them back home. How many times do you sit them down and ask them - " How do you feel my friend, away from family and working in a house and taking alone time can be seen as being lazy? How do you feel my friend?" Bring them for a movie, let them sit on the table to eat with you and let them take walks in the evening. Many of us work 9 to 7pm but when we take a break - we know its a break. These women are on call 24hrs. Waking up at 7 am, making breakfast for kids, getting them ready, sending them to school, cooking lunch dinner, cleaning up and doing all those things that you won't do.

Now, not all women have the same fate, destiny or stories but there are bad apples in every basket.
Respect these women and love them for they deserve it as much as all your daughters do. They need love than most of us. They have real problems. They are tough women. They blur the lines between the roles of a man and women and challenge the norm. These women are the real heroes.

Thank you so much.

I write this post because it is my helper's birthday today. Happy Birthday Darling Yati.
Thank you cooking for me, for loving me as a child and for listening to all my crazy stories in the middle of the night. Thank you for being a sister and thank you for being patient when i  throw a tantrum. I really appreciate you. Happy birthday love. God bless you. xo

Love,

Sharul

Top 10 Weirdest Songs of Bollywood

Hey Peeps,

Hope you're well! In the past week, i have been reminiscing listening to Bollywood's 90s music and i must say that we sure have some of the weirdest songs. I listen to them years later and go - What? Really!? So here is a list of songs that i think are the weirdest or at least just don't make sense to me.


Song : Kash Koi Ladka mujhe pyaar karta ( Hum Hain Rahi Pyaar Ke - 1993)

1. This song is for the desperate people whose love life suck so much they have to sing this song.
    I mean really? - "Kash koi ladka mujhe pyaar karta!" This is a song no one should be singing aloud because what the subtext behind this song is - i just want to get laid and anyone will do! ANYONE.

2.   Ole Ole - Yeh Dillagi

"Jab bhi koi ladki dekhon - mera dil deewana bole, OLE OLE OLE OLE!"

If any man says the words - Ole Ole Ole Ole when he sees a woman
A) he is a freak
B) he is a freak
C) he is a pervert and he probably should sing song No. 1 on this list cos no one will date him

if a man says the words OLE OLE OLE to me - i will kick him in the nuts - i will. Even if its saif ali khan. I will.

3.  Main Laila Laila Chilaunga - Anari No.1

This is another desperate plea for attention. I mean "Main Laila Laila chilaunga kurta phad ke?"

which literally means i will tear my clothes and call out for you. I think this song is really focusing on the fact that both the actor and actresses are wearing cheap quality fabric and its really easy to tear their clothes off. And again here - this is a plea for sex. This song is basically for people who would like to go back to prehistoric times when people hung around naked. 

4.  Barana De Barana De - Insaaf 

This song really is about a man asking some money back from a woman cos he had leant it to her and she apparently didn't return it. I think whoever wrote this song for this situation should pay everyone who ever listened to this song. I think i rather a man OLE OLE me if he wants some money rather than singing the amount out so loudly.

5.  Boi Boi - Laadla 

This song is basically about a man dancing happily cos he just found out that his wife is pregnant and honestly if he my husband sang this song to me - BOI BOI , i would bitchslap him with my stomach. I mean what is BOI BOI! WHAT THE FUCK IS BOI! 

I think he is just happy to know that his package worked and he could impregnate a woman successfully instead of having to say goodbye to them in a bulk of tissues.

6.  Teri Pyaari Pyaar Baatein - Jamai Raja

This song is  for anyone with sinusitis and also in love. Rare combination but its possible. 

So these people in love - having the sniffles are screwing everyone else's happiness by sneezing in their faces. Screw the manners - we will make love in the open today and you know what 

CUM is a thing of the past - the "in" thing involved in love making today is - phlegm!

7.  Main Teri Mohabbat Mei - Tridev

This song basically has the actor asking the actress "Main teri mohabbat main pagal ho jaonga, mujhe aisa lagta hai - tujhe kaisa lagta hai?" She is already dancing around in a park with you! Really? Is it necessary to ask so many questions? Just tell her you love her and cut the crap. And if you really go mad cos you love her so much then she will leave you in an asylum - THAT'S WHAT I THINK.

Mujhe aisa lagta hai..hai..hai..hai.

 

8.  Ding Dong O Baby Sing a Song - Hero

This song's lyrics are - Ding Dong Oh Baby Sing a Song

Just want to tell everyone that Ding dong also means the penal area of a man's genitalia.

Now now, listen to the song and wonder why he keeps talking about the ding dong and wanting her to sing a song.  I don't know. Maybe he wants her to use his ding dong to sing the song? The appropriate instrument will be a mic.

9.   Kisi Din Banoongi - Raja

This song has the actor asking the actress to repeat everything she has been screaming out to him and vice versa. When has anyone liked repetition in love? I mean really? Imagine me telling my partner to do some household chore and if he turns around to say , " Zara phirse kehna!" I will bitchslap him with my BOI BOI.  Here is love between two individuals suffering from hearing loss. 

Alright guys - my top 10 list of Bollywood's weirdest songs!

What?

I missed out number 10?

"ZARA PHIRSE KEHNA!!!!!!!"

Here we go :

No. 10

Yeh Dua Hai Meri Rab Se - Sapne Saajan Ke

So the lyrics of this song really suggest that the actress in this scene is a slut and the hero just hopes that she likes his love making the best and she knows he has many friends and hopes that he likes her friendship the best.

If you  did the math exercise in school  

> Greater or less than. Something like that.

So basically- this a very hopeful song. They are just hoping things work out cos they may not and i think the song writer translated it so well in words. I think every relationship should be like this song. 

So yeh dua hai meri rab se, tujhe articles main sab se - yeh article pasand aaye……

No really. 

I mean it.

That's it for now guys! Hope you enjoyed my TOP 10 Weirdest Songs of Bollywood List!

AAaaaachooooooooo,

Sharul Channa

Interview with Philippines's GB Labrador - My favorite comedian from Asia

Hey folks,

Enjoy this short interview with my favorite stand-up comedian in Asia!

                                 
                   GB LABRADOR (PHI)
                 STAND-UP COMEDIAN

1.  What are the audiences in Manila like?

Answer : They are very universal and well-versed in English. They are extremely Western and you can talk about Hollywood movies and the pop culture and they would know the references. They are very family-oriented and even though majority are Roman Catholic, they are open to any topics. They are very open-minded about the content you have to offer. As long as you mean for it to be a joke and it's not in bad taste. Basically, know how to have a good laugh.


2.  We understand you head the new comedy production house called 'Comedy Manila'. In fact, some call it a revolution. At what stage is this revolution and what are the exciting things we will get to notice in the near future?

Answer : We are at the stage of building our comedy audiences and are hitting colleges and universities  You can look out for new headliners and new upcoming comedians like Red Ollero, Victor Anastascio and James Caraan.


3.  What is a fun bit about Manila that you have?

I always poke fun of the president and how we are a third world country but we focus more on saving dolphins than starving people.

4. What would be your advice to up and coming stand-up comedians?
   Do it for the love of telling jokes. Nothing else. Everything else will follow.

5. How do we contact you for gigs, or if any of the comedians from around Asia want to do some spots in Manila?

Just message Comedy Manila on Facebook/twitter and if you want me to do a gig - just contact my sister Sharul Channa- the woman of steel!


Hope you enjoyed this one. ;)

Love and Laughter,

Sharul Channa

The Past Midnight Story.

She had been looking at him from a distance. Occasionally, glancing at him and then completely ignoring his presence. He noticed nothing because he was not even noticing her. This moment for her was what she waited for the entire week - Her weekly language school lessons. He wasn't in her class but there was a 70 percent chance for her to somehow find him around the school to just have a glance that would give her excitement, fantasy and some replay action in her head for the next week. She saw him taking the stairs down from the 4th floor but from the other side, so she took the fire exit staircase and ran down so she could catch him at the gate of the school before he made his way to recess. She made it  in time to exit the gate right after him and trying not to get too close just in case her heart skipped more than a beat. She walked into the canteen area right after him and waited for him to choose the food or drink he wanted to have. He choose the good old milo from the drinks stall and continued having his conversation with an acquaintance. As he left the shop, she went up and got milo for herself too. Carefully watching him, she strategically placed herself such that  he was diagonally opposite her. She lip read his conversation from a distance and then got lost in thought about the million possibilities they could become friends. What happened next took her by surprise. He started walking right towards her and then stood right in front of her,staring into her eyes - she was stumped.Speechless.Heart racing. Mouth dry. He said, "You're standing in front of the dustbin." She heard nothing. He said it louder this time. She moved. He threw his milo packet, looked at her and smiled and then walked away. She had found her moment. Enough to last her for a week, possibly a month.

Till the next -past midnight story…

The Great Indian Emotional Blackmail.

How do you know you're being emotionally blackmailed?
Very simple. Do you hear the following statements too much around the house?

1. But he is such a poor thing. Oh,my son.
2. I am just an old hag..i will cry and eventually die.
3. Never mind..i can spend my own money.
4. Sometimes when i see other people with their grandchildren..i wish we had one too
5. If you weren't around..i don't know what i would have done.
6. I gave up my life for you.
7. He gave up his life for you.
8. I have not bought myself a single thing since our last anniversary.
9. We always fed you first and sometimes we slept hungry.
10. Look, even my underwear has a hole.

If yes, read on.
If no, read on…you probably are being emotionally blackmailed and are in denial. If you're not Indian..i am sure you have your own version.

What is the cure for this?
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TADAH! The cure for - " The Great Indian Emotional Blackmail. "

There are certain routes you can take.

1." The revenge of the great indian emotional blackmail"
     This means you do the EXACT same thing back to the people who are emotionally blackmailing you by using the same tactics they are using on you.

For example :

A (E blackmailer) : " I will eventually cry and die.."

B ( The blackmailed) : "Same."


There you go!



2.  Cry baby!



For this one -  cry out of the room every time you think you cannot handle the situation.

A (E blackmailer ) : If only my elder daughter was here because you do nothing for me..

B (The blackmailed) : Run out of the room crying and then run out of the house crying and run down the hill crying until you find a shop to buy yourself a nice cool drink. This will make your blackmailer worried that you might do something wrong to yourself and they will relax the fuck down.


3.  The cold reaction AKA - THE REBEL.

You have to give a cold reaction to each statement your blackmailer gives you.

B ( for a change..i would like to make B the emotional blackmailer) : "My legs have been hurting but i don't ask anybody for help..can u please help me clean my dishes?"

A ( The blackmailed) : "No."



4. Confuse them with other information - "The distractor!"

A (E Blackmailer) - "Your father is still alive - he can pay for my expenses..!"

B (The Blackmailed) - " Father was saying that he wanted to bring you for a holiday btw…i think to disneyland since you're into games."

A : Huh?!



If non of the above work - SLAP YOURSELF IN THE HEAD and come up with your own tactics.
Being emotionally blackmailed causes mental stress and unhappiness in you. Stop being treated that way.


Thanks,

Sharul Channa